“Ray of Hope”
Shauna's day started out the same as any other. Or so she thought. How could she know that this day would define the rest of her days?
She rose promptly at 5:30 each morning to a list of daily demands. Cooking breakfast, packing lunches, fussing children, and her persnickety husband, Marvin. Just the sight of him sent her eyes rolling to the ceiling.
"Look at him. Smug bastard", Shauna thought to herself.
She was way beyond being his doormat, but you'd never know it. Her picture-perfect smile was always in place. Though her heart broke a little each day, she wore a mask of happiness.
Looking around her 3-story home, something seemed different to her. She took inventory of her pristine surroundings. Nothing was out of place, but something was wrong. Sitting quietly, it finally dawned on Shauna. It was a long time coming, but she realized that she was different. Married nearly 20 years, she was no longer a young woman with her head in the clouds. She was now in her 40s, and the price she paid for the quest of perfect wife and mother was more than evident. What she wanted didn’t matter anymore. The dancer she used to be was gone. Any other dreams she had evaporated the day she said "I do". Carefree days lunching and laughing with her girlfriends were nowhere to be seen. Truth be told, Marvin was jealous of time spent with anyone but him. He was more than happy to have Shauna under this thumb.
Shauna had all the trappings, but she was trapped. She had no money to speak of, and dropped out of college when Marvin caught her eye. She knew for years that Marvin irked her last nerve, but this had nothing to do with him. Plain and simple, she was unhappy. She filled her days with mindless shopping, if she could get any money out of Marvin. He was a fire-breathing dragon when it came to giving Shauna money. She knew she’d have to lower herself to get it, but decided the trade-off was worth the humiliation.
Her stomach knotted up at the thought of what was about to happen. Marvin’s secretary announced her. Cautiously, she walked in and sat down.
“Why are you here? You know I’m busy, Shauna.”
“I…need money.”
“Why? You have everything you need.”
“I want a few things.”
“What things?”
“Bras, panties, and maybe a blouse or two.”
“Mm hmm. You came all the way down here for that, Shauna?”
“You know I don’t have any money, Marvin. Why do you always make me beg?”
“Because it’s my money, that’s why. You didn’t do a damn thing to earn this money. Any time you want what belongs to me, you have to ask for it.”
“You wouldn’t have the money if it wasn’t for me. Who worked two jobs to help you get your degrees? I did!”
“Don’t piss me off, Shauna. You think I won’t kick yo ass because we in public? Get the hell out my office. Don’t come back down here. And to answer your original question- hell naw you can’t have no money!”
“Marvin…”
“Bye, Shauna.”
She picked up her purse and quickly left Marvin’s office. Once again, her husband had hurt her feelings. She’d cried so many times that her heart was mostly hardened to his hateful ways. Nothing ever kinked her armor until today. Once in her car, Shauna made a frantic phone call.
“Daddy, this is Shauna.”
“I know the sound of my baby girl’s voice. What’s wrong?”
“Just a little tired. Daddy, will you pick the kids up from school for me?”
“That’s no problem.”
“Thank you, Daddy. I’ll get them tomorrow.”
“Why don’t I keep them until Sunday? I’ll even drop them off for you.
“You’re a life saver, Daddy!”
“You sure you’re ok, honey? Do I need to get my gun?"
"No, Daddy. I just need some rest. I’ll see you Sunday."
Shauna hung up the phone feeling relieved. Marvin kept an emergency credit card in his desk drawer at home. She’d deal with the consequences later, but today, the card belonged to her. She had no idea where she was going, but she was going. She threw some clothes in a bag, and she was in the wind.
Although Shauna wanted to leave town, something pulled her in another direction. She drove about 30 miles, and happened on a secluded bed and breakfast inn. She was just far enough from home that she felt like she was escaping. After checking in, she took a walk around the grounds. A beautiful fountain with cascading waters seemed to be calling her name. Shauna took a seat on the edge of the fountain, and began to pray. Desperate prayers. First on the list, she wanted out of her marriage. She'd wavered on this subject before, but no longer. She prayed for the safety of herself and of her children. She’d need money, a place to live, and a job. Her needs seemed impossible, but she prayed anyway.
A catnap by the fountain would've been heaven, but Shauna noticed a man lurking nearby. He was an old man of about 80 years. His skin, dark. His hair, totally gray. His eyes shined as bright as any light she'd ever seen. He probably didn't pose a threat, so Shauna remained seated. All smiles, he took the seat right next to hers. The old man looked shabby. Possibly even homeless.
"Sir, if you came to ask for money, I don't have any."
"A man never takes money from a lady. Besides, I don't need money."
"Oh, I'm sorry. It's just that you look...I thought..."
"I know how I look, Ma'am."
There was silence as the man did his best to straighten his old clothes.
"Do you need help, sir?"
"Actually, I'm here for you, dear."
"Here for me? You don't even know me."
"Ahhh, that's where you're wrong. I know all about you, Miss Shauna."
"Please don't hurt me! I have children that need me!”
He wanted to laugh, but instead, reassured Shauna, and led her back to her seat.
"You're sure my husband didn't send you?"
"Like I said, I'm here for you."
"What do you want from me?"
"I don’t want anything from you.”
"Then why are you here? How did you know I'd be here?
"I've been watching you for awhile, Shauna."
"Are you stalking me?"
"Not stalking. Just watching. I've been worried about you."
"Who are you?"
"Ray."
"Ray, who"
"Just Ray."
"Alright, just Ray. What do you want? I'm not asking you again."
"Still have a temper, I see."
Shauna shot a dirty look in his direction, prompting an answer.
"I live on your street. Seven doors down on your right. I’ve seen you rushing to get your family out of the house every morning. I've also seen you on the front porch with your head hung low. I know all kinds of things about you."
"Like what?"
"I know your you lived in New York before you moved here."
"So. You could have gotten that information on-line."
"I know that your nickname is Antsy Nancy, because you're afraid of your own shadow."
"How could you possibly know that? My mother was the only person who called me that, and she's dead."
"I know. You should stop blaming yourself for her death. It was an accident, Shauna. There was nothing you could've done. I also know that your husband took a swing at you last month. But you ducked. I know of your dreams to be a dancer. Should I go on?”
"Who told you those things?"
"Everything will be revealed in due time."
Shauna scrutinized every move he made, and dissected each word he’d spoken. She didn't know what to make of Ray, but he had her full attention.
"I know you're scared, Shauna. You don't know me, but I know you. Not only are you in a bad marriage, but your life is in danger."
"Excuse me?"
"Your husband’s not who you think he is.”
“What do you mean?”
“He’s wicked.”
“He’s not that bad.”
“He wants you dead.”
"Marvin wouldn't do anything like that to me!"
"Then why did you ask me if your husband sent me to hurt you?
What could she say?
Go home, Shauna.”
"Are you serious?! Why would I go home if I was in danger?"
"I know it sounds crazy, but you have to trust me. Go home. But whatever you do, don't answer your door, or any of your phones. Marvin will say he's going on a business trip for the weekend, but don’t believe him. The second he clears your street, you leave out right behind him. And don’t come back until Sunday night. Don't tell nobody where you're going! There will be money in your mailbox. Don’t use any credit cards. Get as far away as the money will take you. Check into a hotel with a phony name. When you get home Sunday night, the spit should be hitting the fan. Do exactly what I've said, and I promise you'll be safe."
"How did you find out about this?"
“In due time, Shauna. You don't have time to waste. Marvin will be home at his regular time. Go home."
In her gut, Shauna felt that Ray might’ve been telling the truth, but still prayed for signs that trusting him was the right thing to do. She arrived home to find Marvin sitting on the couch, angry as usual.
"Where da hell you been, Shauna?"
"I just ran to the store."
"Hurry up and fix my dinner before I really get mad."
She threw together a quick meal of left-overs, and sat down to eat with Marvin. He always looked across the table with disgust. Tonight was no different. They ate in complete silence. She was scared to talk to him, so she welcomed the quiet.
"Shauna, go upstairs and pack me a bag. I'm going out of town on business this weekend. I should be back some time Sunday."
Ray’s warning rang in her ears. She ran upstairs and quickly began packing his bag. She was just about done when the phone rang. There was no way in hell she was answering the phone, even with Marvin yelling for her to pick it up. Shauna rushed downstairs with his bag, and escorted him to the door.
"Why you rushin' me out the house?"
"No rush. I know you hate to be late. That's all."
Marvin glared in her face, and left her standing at the door. Shauna watched him until she could no longer see his car. This was her chance to get away. She was halfway down the street before remembering there was supposed to be money in her mailbox. She rushed back to find $500 waiting for her. How could she not believe Ray now? She was more scared than ever.
She found an out-of-the-way hotel about 200 miles away. All weekend, she checked the locks on the windows and the door over and over. She managed to grab an hour or so of sleep here and there. She wanted to call her family, but remembered what Ray said. She knew things had gotten bad between her and Marvin, but she couldn't bring herself to believe he'd ever want her dead. That was a pain she wouldn't allow herself to feel. She didn't have the luxury of wallowing in her emotions.
Sunday came all too soon. Shauna drove slow, pulling over many times to whisper a prayer.
"What if Ray is setting me up? What if he's wrong, Lord? What would I do?"
She prayed for God's protection before heading home. She could only rely on her little bit of faith, and hope that Ray was truly there to help her.
"Be with me, Lord" was the last prayer she sent up as she pulled onto her street. Everything seemed pretty calm. Very much unlike what Ray had promised. Shauna was devastated.
"Did Ray lie to me? Why would he go out of his way like that and then lie? I don't understand, God."
She knew her kids would be home soon. What else could she do except go home? Nothing could have prepared her for what she saw when she rounded the corner. All hell had broken loose. There were police everywhere. All of her neighbors gathered around her house, the apparent scene of the crime. Shauna hurried to park her car, and ran to her front door, where she was stopped by an officer.
"Are you Mrs. Johnson?"
Yes I am."
"Ma'am, will you come with me?"
"Am I in trouble?"
"No But I do need to talk to you."
He took Shauna to his car, and proceeded to tell her of Marvin's plan.
"Mrs. Johnson, I’m Officer Gaines. I know this is hard to hear, but your husband hired someone to kill you. We received an anonymous message from a gentleman who had very specific details of the plot. We tried to call you, but we couldn't reach you. When we arrived to check on you, we caught a man breaking into your house. He had 2 guns, a map of your house, and he even had your cell phone number. With all those things, plus the fact that we caught him red-handed, he confessed, and implicated your husband as well. It's a good thing you weren't here."
Shauna was done. She stood there like a lost child with no expression.
"Would you like to see your husband before we take him away?"
"No."
"Don't go anywhere, Mrs. Johnson. We may need to speak with you again."
The only thing Shauna wanted to do was thank Ray for all of his help. She was pretty sure he’d made the anonymous call. Remembering he lived 7 houses down, Shauna quickly cut through the crowd, and down the street. When she got there, she was baffled. There was no 7th house. Only an empty lot. Shauna was at a complete loss. She was absolutely sure Ray said 7 houses down. She spotted Mary, one of her neighbors.
"Mary, come here! Hurry up!”
"Shauna, calm down!"
"Mary, where’s the house? Didn’t there used to be a house right here? Wasn't there a house?!"
"Yeah, but that was like 10 years ago. Why?"
"Who used to live here? Did you know them?"
"Yeah. They were the sweetest old couple. I think the wife’s name was…Millie"
"What was her husband's name?"
"Why are you asking about them? They've been dead for years, Shauna."
"Mary, will you just tell me his name, please?!"
"His name was Ray."
© Antoinette Davis
August 23, 2008
